


BUTTERCUP; three perspectives, one story

by MariposaMonarca



Category: Powerpuff Girls
Genre: Bisexual Male Character, F/M, M/M, Song: Heather (Conan Gray)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-09 22:41:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27943934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MariposaMonarca/pseuds/MariposaMonarca
Summary: Sometimes, because of a lack of communication and clarity in ourselves, we don't manage to be completely happy. Even when we think we know everything about the other person, it turns out that we are silent about our feelings, being the only ones affected. This is the "love" story of Butch and Buttercup... and also of Tommy, Butch's best friend.
Relationships: Brick/OC, Butch/Buttercup Utonium, Butch/OC
Kudos: 5





	1. OO

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [BUTTERCUP; tres perspectivas, una sola historia](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/723008) by Mariposa Monarca. 



> Before reading, I have considered it very important to clarify certain things regarding this story:  
> First, yes, it's a song-fic for which it is based on a Conan Gray song called "Heather".  
> Second, this story contains three perspectives, and that's because when I heard the song (on Spotify) I looked for the lyrics on another platform, which suggested two more fan-made versions; those versions I have to use to make the other two chapters, giving a total of three parts: OC (Tommy), Buttercup and Butch, in that order.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Only if you knew  
> How much I liked you

How could we describe Butch? You probably think he's a shameless womanizer, the one who would ask you for your phone number just to prove to his brothers and pathetic group of friends how easy it was for him to get them. But the truth was far from that idea that most people had. Butch was the one in charge of making everyone laugh, even when he didn't have that intention, his speeches used to be funny because that was his personality, besides that, he was too insecure about himself, he didn't know what he really liked, he was very confused about it, however, that's not something he would go and show everyone. He was able to perfectly hide what he was feeling so as not to distress anyone around him. The only thing he couldn't hide was when someone really interested him.

What about Buttercup? Well, the reality is that Buttercup left aside the "rough and tumble" to explore different facets of herself. She dared to put down her pants and experience a more e-girl style. She was difficult to reach, her cold and distant appearance meant that as soon as you crossed words with her, she would kick your ass so hard that you would reach the exosphere. However, if you looked at her carefully when she was studying every afternoon at the library, you would notice that she was quite delicate, her expressions were far from hard, her look was soft and no, she did not frown. The more you watched her, especially when she was with her sisters, you would notice that her smile was unique, her expressions when she spoke made you want to immortalize every moment, because they were unique, because they were angelic.

Finally, we have Thomas "Tommy" Moon. His Asian ancestry is notorious, impossible not to notice, even if it seemed "racist" to someone, it is inevitable to think so when you see his slit eyes, his light skin, dark hair and how thin he was. Yes, he was top of the class, but that was because he had well-constituted study habits. He didn't like to attract much attention, he was always reserved, cold and distant, to the point that not many people believed that he was really Butch's unconditional friend, whom Butch picked up from his home to go to school together, whom he always hugged and with whom Tommy always clapped his hands when he scored a goal in his games. Tommy was that kind of friend to Butch, his irreplaceable one.

The dynamics between these three seemed not to exist, but because of the events, their routine school lives were affected. And it all started, when Butch realized that Buttercup could be his ideal type of girl, because she was so far from what he was looking for in one. If the boy's initial prototype was "Bubbles," Buttercup was definitely the opposite, and that's why he ended up liking her.

In this story with an evident lack of communication, events are triggered as a result. While Butch is hanging out with Tommy, Buttercup steals his look; while Buttercup passes by and notices Butch's look, he also notices how much fun he was having with his unconditional Tommy, and that she could never interfere between the two.

"Will you come to my house?" asked Tommy as he finished putting his notes in his locker.

"Of course I will," Butch said, running his arm over his friend's shoulders and walking to the exit.

"You never respect personal space, do you?" sighs Tommy.

Butch doesn't respond to him, so he looks at him and notices that he is blushing, while looking to the right. Tommy followed his friend's gaze and noticed that Buttercup and her sister Blossom were located in that direction. It didn't take a genius to know who he was blushing for, when the gesture was reciprocated. Tommy was left with nothing but a sigh and a glance towards the exit; even if he wanted Butch to stop touching him, he wasn't going to ask him to remove his arm, because the only thing he thought he had left to claim were simple crumbs, and he valued them, don't think otherwise.


	2. O1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Watch as she stands with her holding your hand.  
> Put your arm 'round her shoulder, now I'm getting colder

December arrived, and began my slow and painful death as a sensitive human being. I couldn't stand it, I couldn't believe that I was really settling for so little. I was completely soaked, I had just finished my practice when the torrential rain attacked the city. I was left unprotected, the truth is that I thought I might even be left without transportation home. But, I remembered that you lived nearby, so I called you and waited patiently for you to disconnect from your oriental vices. I knew, too, that after the third tone, when it came to me, you answered. No incoming call was answered faster than mine.

" _Tommy!_ " You exclaimed, " _Dude! Did you notice the rain? It looks like the rain from the movie we saw!_ "

"I'm under the roof of a bus stop," I said, "but there's no transportation going on. Can I go to your house and wait for my dad to come get me?"

" _How can you ask me that? Come right away!_ "

"Thank you..."

" _Come down 1975 Street, I'll come out and get you with an umbrella,_ " and you hang up. I knew that when you did that, it was because you didn't want me to blame you.

As if I had ever done it, or thought about it.

**.  
.**

"Come on, take off those shoes," you said and knelt down in front of me, untied my laces and carefully took off my shoes. "I'll put them by the stove".

"They are not wet inside," I said, you turned around and gave me that mischievous smile that characterized you so much.

"Anyway, let's avoid a cold, shall we?" You looked at me from head to toe, then you smiled at me and raised your eyebrows. "Are your pants wet?"

"Only my legs, but it's not that much," I answered quickly, you had already left my shoes by the stove and, at a slow pace, you were approaching me again. "I'm fine".

"Take off your jacket and T-shirt, I'll give you some of my clothes," you said and grabbed my wrist.

I knew the way to your room by heart, there was no way I could mistake it for Brick's, even when its doors were so close together. Not even when we arrived drunk after Mitch's party, you sent me to the room first, you wanted to test me, and I ended up overcoming it, because when you came in, I was already lying in your bed, about to fall overboard from all the alcohol we drank - it wasn't that much, but I have a terrible resistance to alcohol, you knew that, and that's why you stayed by my side all that time.

"Do you like this one?"

Your voice took me out of the thoughts I was having, I found myself in your long-sleeved blue T-shirt, you were showing me the sweater that I liked so much to see you wear, a dark green one with big brown buttons. I nodded my head, you smiled at me and brought it to me. I thanked you, you messed up my curly hair and kept looking at me until I had finished buttoning the last of the buttons. You nodded your head, you raised my chin, my heart was racing at that moment, you smiled tenderly at me and walked away.

"If I didn't love that sweater so much, I'd give it to you".

"Why do you say that?" I was so surprised by your statement, I asked without thinking that, with your answer, you would make my heart explode.

"It looks better on you than on me".

A simple and friendly comment was enough for me. I was happy, incredibly happy, and that's what I meant when I said that I would settle for so little, because that compliment was the only sign of interest in me that you showed. You weren't interested in me, you never were, but I was looking forward to the day when your beautiful green eyes would look at me the same way mine look at you. I liked you so much, Butch, and you didn't even realize it. Those little moments of happiness, where it was just you and me, were enough to keep me excited.

"I offer you tea," you said, and I nodded. "Come on, if you want we can see each other a little bit before the plague that I have as brothers arrives".

**.  
.**

You had your hair a little longer than allowed in school, but you were messing it up, you were wearing a red T-shirt under your black hoodie, you resented my suggesting that you raided your brother's closet before coming, you just crossed your arms and leaned on the lockers next to mine, where I was taking out the notes and book I would need for my chemistry class. You were telling me about what you did over the weekend, I was listening attentively, as always, until you stopped, lowering the volume of your voice, which caught my attention. I turned my face to look at you, and I noticed that your eyes were fixed, your mouth half open, but what made me shudder, was to see the slight blush that appeared on your cheeks. You looked hypnotized. I looked in the same direction, and I could see everything.

Buttercup Utonium was passing by, with her hair loose, reaching a little below her shoulders, falling straight, shiny for her dark tone, she wore that green skirt with white socks and her black sweater, her way of dressing had changed notably, and you, Butch, were not indifferent. You looked at her with so much admiration, love; I remembered that your look used to be something like painful, but with her everything changed... You were moved, and that hurt me, because it was a kind of look that I could never be worthy of.

"H-Hi!" You said and raised your hand.

You don't have to be a genius to know to whom you were dedicating your nervous and enthusiastic greeting. I closed my locker door in anger, and I'm sure you didn't notice, because you were watching Utonium's movements. I looked over my shoulder, and realized that I was right in thinking that you should be talking to her. Buttercup picked up a lock of her hair and placed it behind her ear, smiling shyly at you, something quite strange to see, considering that she was a rough, tough and direct girl. You, meanwhile, were crossing your arms, playing the interesting one, but your nose was red, as well as the top of your ears. You looked happy, and I knew that my being in pain was not healthy. I wanted to be happy for you, but I wanted to let you know how much you were making me suffer.

That's when I realized that I'm not good enough to show my discomfort. You deserved your happiness, and I could not behave in such a selfish way. We were sixteen-year-old fools. You were a fool in love with a beautiful girl; I was a fool in love with his best friend.

**.  
.**

I didn't want to accept it, in fact, I wanted to run away, I wanted to refuse, but you looked at me in hope, you begged me to go with you. You promised not to drink a single drop of alcohol so that you could come and get me at my house and, after that, take me home. You wanted to take care of me, to keep me away from my emotional problems, you wanted me to gain security, God, you cared for me so much that, unfortunately, I was misunderstood all this time. I let myself be carried away by my emotions, by false illusions, until I ended up in love with you, but everything turned out to be one-sided. You would never see me the same way you saw her. It had been almost a year since you and she had become lovers, and I still couldn't get used to the idea.

Buttercup caught your attention as soon as we walked through the door of the house - who's party was it anyway - because you saw her and left me to my fate. But, well, why do I bother? Buttercup was your fucking girlfriend! And I'm just an idiot! In my mind, I always treat her badly, then I get remorse, because Buttercup wasn't a bad person, incredibly, she was a nice girl, very nice, funny... too pretty; I couldn't hate her, it didn't make any sense, she hadn't done anything bad to me intentionally. I am the only one to be hated.

I drank about three glasses, I didn't realize that that burning in my throat wasn't because of how cold that strawberry-mint drink was. It's just that the drink never had any mint in it. It was just strawberry juice with some kind of alcohol. After those three glasses, hopefully I could stand up. I was wandering around the house senselessly, which turned out to be quite large. I saw Buttercup's sisters, the redhead was angry in a corner, crossing her arms, while Bubbles was sitting on the lap of Boomer, her boyfriend, and kissing him, careful not to be too clingy. It was funny. If Brick and Blossom hadn't broken up they would be a pretty funny cliché story.

"Moon?"

When I heard my last name I turned around, Brick was arching an eyebrow, he had a beer can in his hand, one that seemed to have been squeezed hard, it had dents in it. I tilted my head to the side and smiled at him, he was surprised. I said nothing and laughed a little, keeping my pose. He took me by the arm and led me to the backyard of the house to get some air.

"Ah!" I sighed. "Why did you take me out? I was having a good time".

"You were going around and around the place," he said, "like an idiot. I thought you'd be with Butch".

The mention of his name felt like Brick had shot an arrow right through my heart. I was sad, I wanted to cry, it must have been the effect of the alcohol that I wanted to laugh at the whole situation that... made me suffer.

"He's with Buttercup. Holding hands, surely kissing. Ah!" I exclaimed, I looked at the sky, it was clouding over. "Birck! It's going to rain!"

" _Brick_ ," he corrected, "and yes, rain was predicted for tonight. I think I'll go home, I got bored being here. Besides, I don't want to see any unpleasant expressions," he said disgustedly.

"Are you saying that for me?"

"No," he turned to me, "you've never seemed disgusting to me".

We were silent. Brick put his right hand on my hair and gently stirred it. I stared at him, I wanted to engrave his features in my memory. Physically, he was the most handsome of the three brothers, at the same time, he was the most serious. I was always curious about his breakup with Blossom, and all the clues led me to the fact that he broke up with her, since Blossom was the one who always looked at him with hate, with _disgust_.

"It seems like you _are_ like me," said Brick.

"What do you mean?"

"Oh! Tommy! So here you were".

When I heard your voice, Brick stopped touching me, we both turned our heads towards the entrance of the house, where you appeared, wearing a white long-sleeved T-shirt, I wondered why you were so undressed, then I noticed Buttercup, who took your hand, interlacing his fingers... and wore the sweater that I had enjoyed wearing so much.

"Yes," I answered, "were you looking for me?"

"I'll take Buttercup home," you said as you looked at her and smiled, "so I thought".

"Okay," I interrupted, "I'll go home some other way. No problem, I can call my dad".

"Don't you want a ride?" You got confused.

"It's not necessary, besides, you need time alone too, as a couple".

Your girlfriend looked at me in confusion, then seemed to be judging me, while you looked puzzled, not believing what I was telling you. At that moment, Brick takes a step in front of me, as if he were protecting me.

"The truth is, brother, Tommy will stay with me for a while longer".

"With you?" You frowned. "What was the reason?"

"You know damn well _why_ ".

Without saying more, Brick grabbed my wrist and led me inside the house. I looked in your direction, for a second, I noticed that you didn't understand anything, but I didn't feel like explaining it to you either. I didn't want to tell you that I was hurt by the whole situation, but it wasn't your fault! You have no idea how I feel about you! You act like a friend, like what you really are, I couldn't reproach you for anything, I hadn't been honest with you, I didn't have the right to ask or demand "respect" for my feelings. It was a stupid thing to do, one very worthy of a person like me.

"Thank you," I said to Brick.

We were silent, we were on the stairs, almost reaching the second floor. People weren't around us, we were alone. I sat down on one of the steps, he next to me. He looked at me, I felt it, then with his left arm he made me rest my head on his shoulder, I let myself be guided.

"It's okay if you want to cry".

I did not answer him, he left his hands on his legs. I took advantage of the situation, hugged his left arm and began to sob gently. He didn't say anything to me, but it wasn't necessary. I realized that Brick was aware of what was happening between Butch and me. Well, what _wasn't_ really happening.

"He can be an idiot when he sets his mind to it, especially when he doesn't know what's really going on," your brother said. "Another thing is that he doesn't really know what's _happening_ to him either".

I didn't understand that part, but I didn't have a head for thinking. I straightened up, kept hugging Brick's arm, swallowed saliva and looked at my feet. I was dizzy, the alcohol was working; I must have eaten something, damn it.

-Thank you for saving me from there," I whispered to Brick.

-You're welcome," I turned my face to him, and he did the same. I told you, you're like me. I was not wrong, I just confirmed what I had been thinking.

Would it have been an effect of the alcohol? Possibly. Was I about to regret it? At the moment, no. Was I going to consider it an impulse? Definitely yes. However, could it be that I was going to enjoy it? I just had to try it and find out. I got a little closer, but it was Brick who grabbed me by the neck, I got carried away. His mouth was warm, his lips were soft. We didn't open our mouths much, we were just trying it out. I heard a few steps on the stairs, but at that moment I was letting myself be carried away by Brick, I stopped hugging his arm and decided to put my left hand on his abdomen.

We parted for a moment, neither looked at the other, our foreheads were together, I felt the warmth of his breath, and my desire to continue kissing him grew.

"I think we'd better go," said Brick.

"Will you take me home?" I asked.

"Of course".

"But first, could you keep kissing me?"

The footsteps I had heard wandered away, we both looked up at the stairs, but no one was there.

"We'll do it in the car, okay?"

"Okay," I said, "and Brick," he had stood up, turned to look at me, "thank you very much.


	3. O2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I know that when you kiss me it's him that you're always missing  
> You gave me your sweater, but what's polyester?  
> When we are together... But you like him better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Buttercup's perspective, I relied on a cover made by Dalynn (YouTube).

When I made my final change of appearance and looked in the mirror, I couldn't help but cry. I was happy because now I felt comfortable with the image I was projecting. It wasn't that I wanted to meet some standard, it was that I was meeting mine. At the moment of attending school, I can't say that I "stole all the looks", because it wasn't like that, I didn't expect that either, I only cared about the look of one boy, and that was you, Butch Jojo.

I have always liked you, and I could say that I had been so concerned about you that, until about three months ago, I realized that you were constantly looking at me, almost as much as I was doing the same thing. I was excited to think that it was something mutual. However, Thomas Moon's existence was always almost a martyrdom for me. For a long time I thought you two were a couple. The way Moon looked at you made me think that was the case, but then I noticed that you didn't look at him that way, you didn't look at him with those "love" eyes, but rather, it seemed like a somewhat more fraternal look.

Until that moment, when I exchanged the first words with you, when Blossom and Brick broke up. My sister asked me to bring her _pathetic ex-boyfriend_ some books she had lent him. I had never spoken to Brick in my life, Boomer had, but he was courting Bubbles at the time. I also understood that if Blossom didn't ask Bubbles for the favor, it was so as not to ruin the atmosphere that was forming between the two birds that were just getting to know each other. So I came to you, I remember perfectly how nervous you were, you were on one of the benches next to the stairs of the library, by the outside exit, drinking a carton of white milk, your head was resting on the back of the bench. Anyone would have thought you were dead.

"Butch," I said, and you looked at me and stood up in one jump.

"B-Buttercup!" you exclaimed. "What? What's up?" you laughed nervously as you fixed your hair back.

The first words we crossed were our names; I treasured it as the sign I needed to make sure that you and I were destined to be together. It may have been a very childish thought, but I was in love, everything seemed like a sign, everything seemed perfect. After a while, we became a couple. We would be having an anniversary soon, specifically on the same date as the Christmas dance, which happens to be our last dance at school. I was nervous, I wanted that day to be perfect, the memories of the school should be beautiful, memorable, and if those memories were with you, I was sure they would be the best. However, there was something that had been going through my mind ever since we started our relationship: you never stopped talking to me about "Tommy".

"Tommy did this," "Tommy told me that," "Tommy fell asleep in class," "Did you know that Tommy cooks exquisite food," "You and Tommy should meet"; those were some of the things I heard you say most. You always talked about Moon, and when you didn't talk directly, you would bring it up by saying you liked to drink water. But then I thought it was normal that you would tell me about him, since you spent most of your day in his company, went to classes together, and when he finished his sports practice you would leave him at home. I assumed that you took advantage of all the time with him before the end of our schooling and they had to say goodbye, according to what you told me...

"Tommy will go to study at the University of Korea on a scholarship that is granted to him only because he is of Korean descent. It is very likely that he will be accepted into the college of health sciences".

I remember perfectly your sad look, you even tried to smile, but the idea of separating from your friend did not seem encouraging to you. And I wasn't going to reproach you for that, I thought it was ridiculous to do so. That's when I hated myself for being glad that Moon went away. What kind of girl was I becoming? Definitely the kind of person I hated so much.

And now, at the moment we were meeting: that party where Brick said he would take Moon home. I saw an expression on your face that didn't please me at all. Your scowl, your strong and agitated breath, you had let go of my hand and passed over your face. I thought you might be cold, but it seems that the situation with your brother and Moon ended up making your blood boil. At that moment, I didn't know how to feel; I was worried, obviously, because, although there were no insults or anything, it was an argument between brothers; I was also jealous, since it all originated because of Moon; and I was hurt, I felt irrelevant. After a minute you looked at me and smiled. God... how is it that you had so much power over me with just a smile?

"Should we go?" you said, to which I agreed.

We were on our way out, when I remembered that I had to warn my sisters so they wouldn't be looking for me around the house.

"Give me a moment!" I asked. "I won't be long".

"I'll wait for you in the car," you said, I nodded and you came over to kiss me on the lips. "Don't be long".

I said nothing more and went into the room looking for Blossom or Bubbles, but I couldn't find them. I asked Princess if she had seen any of my sisters, but she denied having done so. To be honest, I don't think she paid much attention to me, she was too busy hanging around the neck of her boyfriend, Sglue. I passed them and went to the kitchen, but nothing, I couldn't find them anywhere. At one point, I thought it was my illusion, or something, but I saw a redheaded woman making her way up the stairs, so I followed her. I wanted to make sure it was my sister and not Brick, but a high ponytail was the sign I needed to make sure it was her. Then, when I got to the stairs, I lost all track.

There were two possibilities: he went to the bathroom down the hall or he went up the stairs and locked himself in with someone on the second floor. I'm sure she had gone to the bathroom, but I was curious. The stairs were big, as was the house - not for nothing were we in the upper reaches of Townsville. When you go up twelve steps, then you have to turn around. I reached number ten, heard voices, so I considered it the perfect opportunity to ask if my sister had ever been there.

I never thought that what I would find would be Brick and Moon kissing. I'm sure I turned red, this made me a little uncomfortable, I didn't know how to take what I was seeing. My suspicions that Moon was attracted to men were real, but seeing him kissing Brick threw me off. And Brick, I never would have thought this of him. It's also not like I think it's wrong for two people of the same sex to kiss; it's not like anyone close to me has ever done it. I hurried down the stairs and bumped into Berserk, with a fiery ponytail holding his long red hair in a thin, worn red ribbon.

"It's fine that I'm not to your liking," she said, "but why crash into me?"

"I'm sorry," I replied, "I was still in shock. Uhm..."

"Can I help you with something?" she asked, always rough and with that air of superiority that so characterized her, as well as my sister.

"Uhm, I think I saw Blossom going towards..."

"No," she answered quickly, "I'm the one who went to the bathroom. Your sister isn't around," she frowned and paid attention to my gestures.

"Oh..."

"She's in the backyard," she sighed back.

"Could you tell her I'm going home? Please, I don't feel well, I want to get out of here".

She didn't answered with words, just an annoying nod. After that, I ran out of there. I stumbled a couple of times before I got to the door, and I almost went to pieces when I crossed the threshold, but it didn't matter, I just wanted to get to your car, I wanted you to start it and keep my head clear. You were waiting for me smiling, you bent down to unlock the door, I opened it and got in fast, put on my seat belt and you started. I know you looked at me sideways, but you didn't say anything. You sighed.

"I want to apologize if I made you feel uncomfortable about what happened with Brick and Tommy," you said. "I don't want you to get the wrong idea, I know my brothers are very close to Tommy, not as close as I am, of course. I got upset over something stupid, so I apologize".

"Didn't you know _they liked each other_?" I asked you and you immediately turned your eyes to me.

It was a couple of seconds, you weren't the kind of guy who would do anything rash when you were driving. You looked back at the clear road that would lead us to the city's main avenue. I could see you squeezed your hands on the wheel, your knuckles were sticking out, you snorted and then raised an eyebrow.

"Where did you get that idea?" you asked, trying to sound calm, my heart began to race.

I heard you jealous.

-I saw them kissing," I said.

And you didn't say anything back, you just nodded your head and changed the subject radically. You started talking to me about the Christmas dance, that we should have a date, anyway, you talked about us. That made me relax... a little, very little.

**.  
.**

"Were they kissing?"

"Yes," I said.

Blossom looked at me with a frown, sighed and shook her head.

"It took longer than I expected," she said.

I was stunned, for a moment I thought she would burst into screams, tears, I don't know. I had imagined an extremely dramatic scene, but no, she was as usual, a little surprised, yes. I kept looking at her while she kept her clean clothes in her closet, until she noticed me, looked both ways, again at me and shrugged her shoulders.

"Is something wrong?" she asked.

"Are you all right?"

"What are you talking about?" She sat down on his bed, facing me.

"I just told you that Brick and Moon were kissing, and you said it took longer? I..."

"Why do you think Brick and I broke up?" She interrupted me.

"Huh?" she sighed.

"Buttercup, Brick confessed to me that he had romantic feelings for Thomas, that's when he and I broke up," I covered my mouth in shock. "Maybe Butch was upset about that, too. Your boyfriend knows about his brother's feelings for his best friend. He probably reacted that way because he doesn't want Brick to make Thomas suffer".

"God," I said, "now everything seems to make sense. Butch wasn't jealous," I muttered.

I left my sister alone in her room, decided to go to mine. I had a date with you today, I wanted us to go shopping for a matching dance accessory. I remember that when I suggested it to you, you accepted right away, even asking me to help you choose a color shirt so that it wouldn't clash so much. With everything Blossom said to me, I felt my confidence returning to me. You weren't interested in Moon, that made me happy, after all, it was just a misconception on my part.

Or at least, that's what I wanted to believe.

**.  
.**

"Ah!" you complained, I laughed. "It should stop being cold in December".

"And why?" I asked you and you put your arm around my shoulders.

"Because it's always good for a change. In the southern hemisphere they are hot, what would it be like to spend a Christmas and a New Year wearing sleeveless shirts and dancing in the streets? It must be the most wonderful thing in life" you looked at me smiling, I couldn't help but reciprocate. "We have to do it one day".

"Calm down a bit," I said, and you kissed me. "We don't have enough money to pay for a trip to some ideal country for the holidays".

"It doesn't have to be now, maybe when we're older".

I shook my head, you laughed. We kept walking through the corridors of the shopping center, until we got hungry and you wanted to go for a hamburger or "greasy food to clog my arteries". Obviously I stopped you, suggested that we better go for an ice cream at the store on the roof of the mall, along with the remains of food places.

"So let's imagine we are in the southern hemisphere," I said, and your little green eyes glowed with enthusiasm.

"Now you understand why I love you so much, right?" You said and kissed my forehead. "Let's go get that ice cream".

In the winter season, there aren't many people waiting for ice cream or something cold, so it was better for us. Unfortunately, the ice-cream store that we liked to visit frequently, the one where we could make our own ice-creams, with the toppings we wanted, was next to the busiest coffee and donut store in winter. If you got a table it was because you were privileged, you were waiting at least forty minutes for one to be free. I didn't give it much thought, but apparently you were staring at one of the tables by the window.

It was just Brick and Moon at what looked like a date. Moon was wiping Brick's cheek, which was stained with, I think, strawberry jam, as he smiled at him, while Brick let himself be treated by him. I looked at you, you were frowning, you pressed your lips together, then you shook your head and looked at me. Your gaze immediately softened.

"Should we go get that ice cream?" You asked me, I smiled and nodded.

There was nothing left for me to do but smile. I understood that you cared about your friend, but you should accept people's feelings. If Moon liked your brother, it was his choice, and if the feelings were reciprocated, then why not be happy? In the end, I'm sure both your brothers and Moon were happy to know that you and I were dating. I understood your concerns and your insecurities.

But, in reality, I understood that with all that internal monologue I was trying to convince myself that that was what was bothering you and not what was really going on. I'm not stupid, I know those looks. Butch, you weren't angry with your brother because he "could" hurt Moon, you were upset because you were jealous, damn jealous. That's when I could tell something. You love me, yes, I realize that, I can feel it. From the softness of your touch, the way you soften your gaze when you look at me, the words you always have to say to me. You love me... But you feel things for Moon, things that have not seen their end because they have never had a beginning.

As I watched you play with the candy topping, I could conclude that I hated being me. Despite having you by my side, it was obvious that I didn't have you sentimentally. You were always thinking about Moon, and there's nothing to change my mind.


	4. O3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why would they ever want me? I'm not even good enough for me.  
> I gave you my sweater, just polyester.  
> Who I like better? Maybe is...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For Butch's perspective, the chapter is based on a cover by Zachary Tay.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror, I hated myself for smiling. How was I able to have a pathetic smile drawn on my filthy face? How? Could you explain it to me? Well, no, because like all liars, I had no intention of revealing the truth and had to disguise myself.

“I look handsome," I said aloud, because I knew I was being watched. “There's no doubt that Buttercup and I will be the most admired tonight, right?”

“Yes, yes," Boomer said to me as she finished fixing the collar of her polka-dot shirt, "whatever you say”.

I hit my brother on the head a little and came out of the bathroom so he could take over. Once in my room, I sat on my bed and checked my messages. Most were from you, Buttercup, telling me how excited you were about tonight. I couldn't lie, I was nervous and anxious too, I wanted everything to be perfect, I mean, it was our last prom in school, then we were going to college. God, I couldn't handle everything I was feeling right now. I stood up and put the palm of my hand over my white shirt and my gray slacks. I left my cell phone on the shelf of my clothes and ran my hands through my hair; it was longer than before, but it still couldn't be a mane. I threw it back, took a deep breath and picked up my cell phone again to answer it.

" _I'll pick you up in thirty minutes. I love you. I can't wait to see you_ ”.

“How much longer will it take you guys to get ready?” I asked, coming out of my room, looking at my cell phone. I wanted to see if that bastard Tommy had answered my message.

You were aware, weren't you, Buttercup? Since he and my ugly brother started their relationship, the time we spent together had been reduced further - considering that the first reduction was when you and I started ours. Now I was the one waiting for him to answer me, for him to realize my existence and for him to make time for me. It hurt that I wasn't the one who accompanied him to his practice on the weekends and then went to get those fruit drinks he loved so much. How I missed bothering him for always choosing the dragon fruit one! The only time we spent together was during breaks, especially when he was going to chemistry class, staying close to me, since the science labs were close to the art rooms. Our conversations were still the same, the dynamics in the group didn't change that much either... Only now it was Brick who was passing his arm over Tommy's shoulders, plus he was passing his jacket or umbrella. He looked after him like the angel he was, while I took a back seat.

“I'm ready," said Boomer. "How long will it take us to get to the girls' house?”

“Twenty minutes, so you can brush your teeth or do a photo session if you want," I said as I shook my cell phone and smiled at him. “I want to upload them later to my social networks. And the ugly Brick?”

“He's not ready yet. He's finishing his hair”.

“I don't know why you're trying so hard!” I shouted into the bathroom. “Tommy knows you're ugly! You can't fix it! You don't have my face!”

“That's exactly why he likes me," Brick said as he came out of the bathroom, completely combing his hair.

My goodness, he looked handsome. His ugly serious face was radiant, giving him a stylish touch, who would have thought that the boy with the hanging snot would have hit puberty so well. Seeing him, I honestly could understand why most girls were attracted to Brick. Damn bastard.

“Because I don't have your face," he added, and since you know me so well, you know I gave it a look from a few friends.

“Your relationship with Tommy is still not approved by me," I warned him. “I've got my eye on you, Brick”.

“As you wish, shall we take our pictures?” He asked, and I heard that dull ringing of bells on his cell phone to notify him when a message came in. Obviously, he took his cell phone out of his black pants pocket. I don't think I can forget the smile on his face.

“Is it Tommy?” I asked, Boomer looked at me, and when I waved back, I noticed that he looked worried.

“It's Tommy," said my brother, "but what about the photos?” .

**.  
.**

In the end, Tommy, you never answered my message, and when we met at the prom, you excused yourself by saying that you forgot to answer, but that you had read it. Come on, you really didn't have time to tell me what color your tie was? I just wanted to know if you would match Brick. Certainly, your tie was gray, it matched your blue suit, while Brick was wearing a black one with a dark red tie... What matched you perfectly was the bouquet of flowers you had in their pockets. You two stole everyone’s looks, especially mine.

I don't know if you, at some point in the night before twelve o'clock, deigned to look at me, because when I looked at you, you only had eyes for my ugly brother. Was he making you happy? Well, okay, I agreed, I didn't expect anything else but your happiness, however, it bothered me so much that you would have found it in one of my brothers, when at first it was supposed to be _our_ happiness, our _friendship_. Was I being jealous or just stupid? It was the latter, no doubt about it.

All the bitterness I felt when I looked at you with my brother would pass when I directed my eyes and attention to the beautiful girl who was with me. I've never been much of a believer in the heavenly entities, but after seeing Buttercup in that delicate yellow dress, with her hair up in a bun leaving a few curls loose, I was sure the angels could have their look. I was so lucky to have her by my side, to have her here, holding my hands while she helped me coordinate with the pop song that was playing. She smiled at me and the world stopped for me. There was no one brave enough to interrupt us when we were dancing, let alone when we were kissing.

Buttercup's mouth was to taste a bit of that heavenly taste. The rose water was like a vulgar drink compared to the taste of Buttercup. However, no matter how much she kissed me and how much I laughed at her with my clumsy steps, my attention was drawn back to you. You smiled at Brick in a way you used to smile at me. You stroked Brick's cheek as you once did me. You let Brick kiss your knuckles. You kissed Brick no matter what the cavemen said about their relationship.

At one point, I felt Buttercup's hand on my cheek, she made me look at her, she smiled at me while I tried to reciprocate. She didn't say anything to me, she just watched me, I felt intimidated, because although her look didn't seem to have any hint of anger, it did have that nostalgic, melancholic aura. I arched my eyebrows, took her hand and gently, gently, slowly pulled it down. She seemed to sigh, I could tell by the movement of her shoulders at that moment.

“What's going on?” I asked.

“I need to go get some air”.

“I'm coming with you”.

“No," she answered quickly, "it's not necessary. It's just a breath, I'll be back in a moment”.

“Are you upset?”

“No! Not at all," she seemed not to be lying, "but it made me restless. Don't overthink things, baby, it's all right, really”.

At that moment, she took my face with both hands and came over to kiss my lips, caressed my cheeks with her warm, slightly sweaty thumbs, and kept smiling at me.

“I'll be with you in a minute, okay?”

I didn't tell her anything, I let her go. It was an impulse, I want to swear to the world that it was, I want to convince myself that it was not my intention, that if I had thought twice I would not have done it. The reality is that for a moment I felt free, and how would I take advantage of that freedom? By talking to you, Tommy. I turned around, looked around for you with just my eyes, and when I found you, I rushed to you, grabbed your arm, and dragged you with me to the bathroom. I didn't give a shit if you were in an interesting conversation with Boomer, his girlfriend and your ugly boyfriend.

“What are you doing?” you told me.

“I'm kidnapping you," I replied, trying to be funny. “No, the truth is I'm rescuing you from the torment of the dragon”.

“What? Let go of me!”

You broke my grip when we met near the bathrooms, I saw your frown and felt a certain fear because I did not remember you seeing me that way. You fixed your tie, sighed and looked away for a few seconds. We were in the hallway, the music was booming, you were waiting for me to say something, and I really didn't know where to start.

“If you wanted to spend time alone with me, all you had to do was ask me to dance. It's not like you haven't done it before, in the previous proms. Don't you think this was a bit hasty and in bad taste? I was in the company of Boomer, Bubbles... my _boyfriend_!”

“Don't say it like that!” I shouted, to my own surprise.

“What?”

I can swear that at that moment it was not me, rather, it was, but it was a side that I sought to keep hidden for the rest of my life. Not that I wasn't impulsive, I was, quite. However, this impulse was loaded with anger, rather, frustration because I am not able to express what I want in the right words. My hands were on either side of your head, which was leaning against the wall in the hallway. I had you cornered, our distance was short, I put one of my feet between yours, thus preventing you from running away.

“Butch…” You whispered my name, but I ignored you, I knew you weren't afraid of me, you were just startled, you looked at me with an arched eyebrow, incredulous of what I was doing.

“How come it was so easy for you to assume what you feel for the ugly Brick?”

“Can you stop calling him ugly?” You asked, tilting your head slightly to one side. “You know damn well there's nothing ugly about him, come on”.

“Answer, have you always been attracted to Brick?”

“It has never been a secret to anyone that I am not attracted to women. You're my best friend. Are you going to tell me you've never noticed? Are you kidding?”

“When Buttercup told me she saw you making out with Brick I thought you were just making out, you know, because of the alcohol and all that, but I didn't think you guys could really feel anything”.

“Didn't you know about Brick's feelings for me?”

“Yes, but what does that have to do with it? I wasn't aware of yours. If I did, I don't know, I would have thought you had feelings for me first, before I thought you had feelings for him”.

Neither of us blinked, in fact, we were already beginning to frown. You snorted after I spoke and looked away from me, but you had no way to run away, I still had you cornered. You had no choice but to look at me and answer me as you fixed your brown eyes on me. You were angry, I think I had just fucked up the situation with my previous comment.

“He and I _look alike_ , or so I thought…” you mumbled that last one, although it's not like I gave it much thought at the time either.

“Looking like what, that you're both attracted to men?”

“Don't fuck with me, Butch!” You exclaimed irritably, "Do you realize how much shit you've been spitting out? What century were you born in?” You pushed me away, just so you could get me away from you. “We were both attracted to someone who didn't know about our feelings”.

“How is that?” I was stunned, I tried to lock you up again, but you knocked my arm off with your hand.

“What you heard. Think a little, will you? Don't fuck up my night, don't fuck up your girlfriend's night either, okay?”

You didn't tell me more, you went down the hall back to the party. I was stunned, we had never yelled at each other, much less like that! It's just, we had never been angry with each other, and now, things were tense. I wanted to be hung from the top of a tree. I passed a hand over my face, accompanying the gesture with a horrible sigh. There was nothing left for me to do in that cold corridor of white lights. It would be better if I went back to the party and spent time with Buttercup. You were right, I shouldn't fuck up your night, or my girlfriend's. It didn't matter anymore, I had already fucked myself.

**.  
.**

I didn't want to be around Tommy for the rest of the night, and I was sure it was mutual. As soon as I got back from that hallway, I went looking for you, Buttercup, but I didn't see you anywhere. I avoided looking in the direction of Tommy and Brick, who were still with Bubbles and Boomer. When I didn't see you anywhere, I wanted to curse my luck because I couldn't help but think that you were with them. I was already thinking of one or two situations I would avoid being in that social circle, putting my lies into action... I had no choice.

However, that was not necessary, because I felt some hands covering my eyes. I knew perfectly the softness of your hands, especially the delicacy of your fingertips. I took them and turned on my heels. I saw you smiling, like a child who had just made a mischief. I kissed your hands and kept them intertwined with mine. That smile, that beautiful and perfect expression on your face, really made me feel like the luckiest man on the planet.

“I was looking for you," I said.

“I know, I had been watching you while you were doing it, but it seemed so funny that I left you for a moment," you laughed again. “But I'm here now”.

“Yes, I see you. Anyway, I thought you'd be longer”.

“Of course, look, it's just that,” -you looked down for a moment, “I found some girls from my music class, we started talking for a while, but it was very short, because their boyfriends arrived and, of course, I didn't want to be the third wheel. It must feel ugly to be in that position, don't you think?”

“I imagine so. I've never been in that position before”.

You nodded, smiled back at me. You wanted to tell me something, I could tell, I knew you so well that I knew that look was one of doubt, as well as sadness. Why would you have to be sad? I was worried that I didn't know.

I went to the bathroom, Butch," you finally said, "and listened to the conversation you had with Moon.

I swallowed, I was nervous. Shit, why was I so nervous?

“What's wrong with him? We argued, that's all, let's not make a big deal out of it," I just said.

“You might have the balls to tell me, don't you think?” You told me.

"Tell you _what_ ," and I frowned. “That I argued with him? For what purpose? I'm not going to let that make our night, Buttercup. Tonight is our night, no fighting or arguing with anyone is going to ruin our night, please”.

“Are you sure? You say everything like you don't care”.

“It's just that, right now,” and I took your face with both hands, “nothing and no one matters to me more than you. I don't want to ruin your night, let's not let that happen”.

“Are you sure you're okay?”

I didn't answer you with words, but I did with a slow kiss on the lips. You were the most important thing I had at that moment. I wanted to make you happy, you deserved all the happiness in the world, because you are a beautiful and delicate angel, one who fell in love with me, and the truth is that I cannot be so... stupid, for not valuing you and giving you, through my love, all the happiness you deserve.

Sometimes, I wish you weren't my girlfriend, so I wouldn't give you a hard time because of my insecurity. I hate myself so much, you have no idea how much.

**.  
.**

“And when you went to leave her? Didn't you talk about it again?”

Boomer was tidying up his library while I was lying in his bed. I told him everything that had happened last night, and the truth is that I would have liked Brick to have been present as well, so that he would clear things up and he would tell Tommy that I wasn't angry and that I was in fact sorry, but my ugly brother was busy at the moment - I have no idea what he might be doing - so I was left without him, just with Boomer. Anyway, he was the most sensible of the three, so when Brick and I were facing some difficulty, Boomer would wait for us and listen to us carefully.

“No," I said, "I just filled it with praise. We laugh a little, you know, when you remember funny moments of the evening. We kissed, obviously, until she finally went inside her house”.

“I understand... And with Tommy?” He turned to me with a young adult book in his hands. “Have you talked to him?”

“I sent him a message apologizing, but he still hasn't read it. He's sure he'll do it after noon, his study habits prevent him from taking his cell phone earlier, and with all this from his scholarship application, he must be trying too hard to get a good seat,” I sat on my brother's bed, he had turned around to continue arranging his books. “Now that I think about it, is it possible for Brick and Tommy to continue their relationship? Considering the distance, not only physical, there is also a time difference... Oh, no, I was worried. Is Brick so unlucky that this is happening to him? Now I regret calling him ugly so many times... He will end up losing Tommy”.

“But Brick is applying for an undergraduate scholarship at Seoul National University, so I don't think he'll lose Tommy”.

“What does that have to do with Tommy?” -I was surprised, and Boomer turned around again, looking at me with a confused expression on his face.

“That Seoul National University is, oddly enough, in Seoul," he said as if it were obvious.

“I still don't get it. I mean, I understand about the name, but... So? Is that close to Korea or what?”

“My God, Butch! Does your head remember anything about the capitals you liked to study so much in elementary school?”

“No, it doesn't,” I said with a question tone.

“Seoul is the capital of South Korea”.

I remained silent analyzing the information I had just received. I stood up when I realized.

“Brick is going to study at the remaining Seoul National University in Korea?!”

“It's the only "Seoul National University" that exists, but yes," he closed his eyes, I understood that he was tired of hearing so much stupidity coming out of my mouth, and I don't blame him, really. “That's why he's been studying so much. He has to give a test and a next interview at the embassy. If all that goes well, our brother will get a great scholarship. Round-trip tickets, small allowance and a training to master the language so that he can work part-time so that he doesn't lose focus in his studies. Didn't he ever tell you that?”

“Maybe he did, but I didn't pay attention to him because I was insulting him in my mind…”

“You're hopeless," he sighed. “Anyway, I want you to answer me something”.

He finished arranging his books and then walked over to me. From his position, he was superior, in this situation I felt even more vulnerable. Boomer had an intimidating look, his blue eyes penetrated inside you every time he got serious, and this was the occasion.

“We both knew here that Brick liked Tommy, that is, when he came in with the red cheek from Blossom the day they broke up, he confessed to us what his interests were, it was a tense conversation as a result of Brick's fear of opening up, remember?”

“How could I not remember," I answered, "I will never forget Brick's crying, it was too heartbreaking”.

“Okay, so after he confessed that, and told us he liked Tommy, no one thought it was wrong or weird, right?”

“Exactly”.

“You thought it was great that Brick could realize that Tommy had a lot of qualities, _worth admiring and lovin_ g," he repeated my words.

“Yes…” My voice was getting lower and lower.

“Now, the only time Brick was with Tommy was during breaks, when we were all in a group, really, and you were always there," I nodded. “However, you started your relationship with Buttercup," I nodded again, "and you weren't so present in the moments we all spent together”.

“Okay, what are you getting at?”

“You started your relationship. Tommy, who had always been there for you, took a back seat, and he understood, after all, he knew how much you liked Buttercup, how much you wanted to talk to her, hold her hand, kiss her, right?”

“Boomer…”

“It was at that moment that Tommy and Brick started to get closer, and at the party, where they gave each other the first kiss, it was that they decided to start getting to know each other, which resulted in the beginning of their relationship”.

I didn't answer anything, I heard Boomer's stern tone, even when it wasn't really like that. Why did I feel like I was being scolded? Why did it affect me so much? I didn't understand it, I really didn't. My heart started beating fast, as if I was waiting for an answer that wasn't going to come.

“Do you have any idea how much Tommy might have suffered when you started your relationship with Buttercup? As long as you were happy with her, he couldn't feel the same way. And now that he is finding happy moments with Brick, you are able to be so selfish as to give him such a hard time at the prom. Don't you realize what you did?”

“I behaved like a selfish idiot”.

“No, Butch, you weren't selfish, you were something else”.

“Something else?”

“You were jealous. And no, you were not jealous in a "friendly" way, meaning that you were angry because your friend was relating to someone else. You were jealous in a romantic way”.

“First of all, I don't like men, okay? I think I might have been jealous, but not in a romantic way, and that's not what I meant!”

I walked to Boomer's bedroom door to get out, but before I did, he said one last thing to me:

“No one is worse blind than the one who doesn't want to see. Didn't you ever realize that you two had feelings for each other?”

And I went out. I didn't want to hear any more, no, I couldn't hear any more. Had Boomer been able to realize the secrets that I tried so hard to keep hidden? I have always tried to be a difficult person to read, however, you can't fool a good reader. I thought it had all been forgotten, buried somewhere in my heart, but Boomer had been able to tell me out loud, looking me in the eye, spitting in my face what I didn't want to assume: I, Butch Jojo, was jealous.

**.  
.**

After lunch, I locked myself in my room and didn't want to leave it until it was time for snack, or rather, dinner. I could barely see Brick's face, because he was late to the table, ate in five minutes and went back to his studies. Our parents were proud of him, I was proud of him too, it was great that he could have good academic alternatives, besides, he was not a bad student, for sure they would take that into account, they would accept him and he could go to school.

Just the thought of him being around Tommy made me jealous. It wasn't worth denying it, not now, I was already exposed. I always thought that I would have to keep it a secret, especially since I didn't think it could be something mutual. That way I thought it would be a way to have Tommy by my side for the rest of my life. When I realized how much I liked Buttercup, I thought having him as a friend was better than never having him again.

Buttercup, in my life, entered as if it were her own home. She came in and took over my heart, and when we started to get to know each other, she could already be considered the owner, the one who wasn’t going to be taken out of her home for anything in the world, leaving Tommy in a corner, from which he wasn’t going to come out. I tried to make sure that, even if Tommy had to share a small place in my heart, it would be a comfortable place, one that would not be taken away from him for anything in the world. I thought I still owned his heart, until Brick came along and, just like Buttercup did with mine, he stayed the owner of his heart, giving me a small place. We were both even, but why did it bother me so much that he took it so normally? Of course, he must have thought the same way when I did.

I stood up and looked out the window. It was getting cloudy, it would probably rain. I was vulnerable, I let myself be carried away by my thoughts.

When I saw Buttercup and noticed my feelings for her, I had a great desire to talk to her, to... to be someone important to her. It's not as if I had never noticed her existence, it's just that I hadn't imagined how much I could like a person, in this case, just by sight. A girl who was not afraid to express what she felt, possessed of an incredibly sweet smile despite her rough appearance. I definitely wanted to stay by her side forever, she was more than I could have imagined. A beautiful person in the full sense of the word, appearance and personality. Buttercup was a girl with a sense of humor like mine, and although she could throw tantrums when she was forced to do something she obviously didn't want to do, she would put on the most tender expressions, those that made me want to hug her and kiss her all over her face. I had a good time with her, more than I could have imagined at the time. She was the girl I didn't know I was waiting for... But, did I deserve her? How could I tell her that I loved her? How did I have the face to tell her a lot of nice words of love while, also, thinking about someone else?

On the other side, there was Tommy. My unconditional friend, the guy I could show myself vulnerable to. Tommy was different than anyone else to me, no one had any doubts about that, from the moment I met him I knew that he and I would have a special connection. I never saw him interested in anyone, that's why when we started getting closer, I felt like the luckiest human being in the world. Little by little, I realized that what I felt for Tommy was not just a friendship. He used to wear my clothes, and being so thin, he gave me a quite tender look; he let me play with his hair, one that used to be a little long, I liked to make him bangs, I also liked the smell he had, always clean, always, always. If I had liked Tommy in a stronger way I would never have noticed Buttercup, but what if it had been the other way around? I'd be on the same stage.

I stood on the frame of my window, which I kept open to feel the cold wind, as if it were a punishment I was imposing on myself. I bent my knees and stayed in that position for a few seconds. I was going to cry.

I'm a disgusting, disgusting person. I'm playing with two people, as if they were puppets, even if I didn't mean to do it in the first place. I don't value Buttercup as my girlfriend, and I don't let Tommy enjoy his relationship. I'm self-centered, I'm indecisive. I don't deserve the attention I get, I don't deserve the love they feel for me.

Who could stand to be next to a doubter who doesn't want to lose?

I don't deserve them, I really don't.


	5. OX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Why would you ever kiss me? I'm not even half, as pretty.  
> You gave her your sweater, it's just polyester, but you like her better.  
> Wish I were Heather.

If we could describe Brick, he would be "the most serious of the three brothers," and he is also considered "the most aspirational”. At first, everyone thought that Brick's desire to study at a good university was merely a whim, because as soon as he broke up with Blossom, he went out of his way to try to learn Korean and some of its culture. "Did you know that Koreans have a different way of counting," "Did you know that everyone in Korea has an extra year? I mean, we wouldn't be seventeen, we'd be eighteen! Although we would still be illegal," "Korea has a lot of interesting and appealing cuisine, even one of the foods sold on the streets is a prized dish in Korean restaurants around the city”. Brick was always into science, and when he learned about the genetics curriculum, he decided that Seoul National Univers

“I don't understand, Brick," Butch said again. “A year ago, when you broke up with Blossom and said you were going to Korea, I took that as a whim or an excuse to make it clear that you didn't want to be around her. How did you think you'd be around him like that?”

“What are you talking about?” Boomer intervened. “We all knew that Tommy could go study in Korea, but he finally made the decision”.

“How so?” -Brick sighed when he said that, so Butch looked at him. “Did you know that too?”

“Butch," the older boy pressed his lips, "when he started talking about it, it was the same time you were starting to get close to Buttercup, maybe that's why you didn't know, because you didn't pay attention to him”.

The room was flooded with silence, Butch felt guilty, while his two brothers lamented his feelings. Brick took a deep breath and looked at the letter again. He was overthinking the matter, so he began to open the envelope. At the sound of the paper tearing, his brothers raised their heads and watched him intently, expectantly. When they saw their brother's tears and that he was extending the letter to them, they knew it was good news. Brick had been accepted.

ity would be his _alma mate_ r. While no one understood why he wanted Korea at first, after his relationship with Tommy, it all made a little more sense.

“You always wanted to be close to Tommy, right?”

At his brother's question, Brick looked up from the sealed letter he had received. Butch and Boomer were sitting on his bed while he was leaning against the window. The older one was slow to respond, but ended up nodding. Butch, meanwhile, felt as if something was being nailed to his chest.

**.  
.**

Butch watched his brother in the distance, raising a glass of juice, as if he were toasting, adding that they were at home, hence his parents present, so they were not allowed to drink alcohol. The farewell had been organized by Bubbles and Boomer, who were excited throughout the meeting, especially Bubbles, who could not help but cry over the departure of both.

“You must report constantly," she said, "I cannot bear not to hear from you. The time difference doesn't have to influence or be a problem, is that clear?”

“Communication can't be lost," added Boomer, "so even if it's an _emoji_ , we need to know you're okay”.

Brick nodded as he held Tommy by the shoulder. Butch had stayed out of it a bit, but Buttercup was by his side, and she seemed to be the anchor that kept him on the scene. But he wanted to stay that way, distant, especially when he realized that Brick had passed his sweater to Tommy, one that was too big for him, especially the sleeves, which the boy began to fiddle with. He cursed himself and, as if he had flipped some kind of switch, took his girlfriend's hand and included himself.

“We must make a toast to the success of both of them," said Butch, raising his arm, Brick and Tommy smiled at him. “I want you to know that we will always be waiting for your reports, but more than that, personally, I want you to have many new experiences, to know a world different from ours? I want you to know that this is something you deserve for all the effort you put into it”.

They made a toast, Tommy and Butch made eye contact, and after that, the Korean guy asks her to follow him, excuses himself to his boyfriend, but tells him that he needs to talk something over with his _best friend_. It was already a little warmer, it was the beginning of March and they had to leave for Korea. After graduation, Brick went into language leveling, while Tommy was taking tests to prove he was fluent in Korean, which was his native language as well.

“How are your classes going?” Tommy asked. “I'm assuming it was still difficult for you and Buttercup to travel all the way here just to say goodbye”.

“Don't say it like it's a bother, as soon as we heard about Bubbles and Boomer's farewell, we didn't think twice about it, we came without thinking that much''.

“Luckily you are studying at the same university”.

“If you think it's lucky to be close to each other, then yes. Although the Humanities campus is far from the Scientist, so it's not like we're very close either, the truth is we don't see each other”.

“But you live together, so don't complain so much. Besides, it's still good to take a break, surely in class it's better to concentrate on accomplishing something than on looking out the window while waiting to see her pass by, right?”

After the prom, Butch thought he and Tommy couldn't be friends again, but by the time he sent a message asking him to meet, Tommy had sent one asking him the same thing. So they talked, Butch apologized for being such an idiot, while Tommy told him he shouldn't have been so defensive. Neither of them admitted the feelings they might have had, and one way or another, they both knew it was for the best.

“Maybe you're right, Tommy," he laughed a bit. “Do you know where you're going to stay?”

“We decided we should stay somewhere in between. My college is in Anamdong and Brick's is in Gwanakgu," he said with perfect pronunciation, "so we looked for landmarks and found Itaewon. The apartment we got is enough for us, we managed to get two rooms, there we'll see how we end up settling in”.

“And you've already heard of those places? You talk so nicely," Butch said, somewhat uncertainly.

“My father says that Itaewon is the soul of every college student, and because of the parties there, it's also a good place to get part-time jobs”.

“So it's great”.

They were silent, Butch carefully observed how Brick's sweater looked so good on Tommy despite being too long for him. He didn't dare say anything about it, because he had no reason to do so, he didn't deserve it, it would only end up creating unnecessary problems, and he had already promised himself one thing: he would never play with other people's feelings again.

“Tommy, I want to ask you something," he said suddenly, looking at him and raising his eyebrows, indicating that he was listening to him. “I want you to do your best, I know you're smart, and an incredibly kind person. I don't want you to ever forget me, you are my best friend, your leaving breaks my heart into a thousand pieces, but I don't want you to be unaware of what may be waiting for you in Korea. I want you to be happy, to try new things... I want you to remember me,” his voice broke. “And if I have to send you a thousand messages, I will. I'm going to miss you more than I do now, but that will only make me want to hug you when we meet again. Because we will see each other again, won't we?”

“Of course we'll meet again," Tommy muttered, bringing his hand close to Butch's face and using his left thumb to wipe away Butch's tear. “Even if it takes time, we'll see each other again. I won't forget you either, as I told you, you're my best friend, I couldn't forget you even if I wanted to”.

At that moment, Butch, without warning, put his arms around Tommy, while the latter reciprocated the gesture. His arms were interspersed, and with that kind of hug, it meant they didn't want to let each other go. They were both unaware that Brick had been watching the scene since Butch said the last part. It's not like he had been spying on them, he just wanted to tell them that the food was ready, he couldn't help but overhear. He was touched by the hug they shared, so after seeing that, he decided to give them some time. He trusted his boyfriend, he knew that he and his brother had issues to settle and to tell each other before they didn't see each other for a long time, so he didn't have any bad thoughts about it.

“Please," Butch said, "if Brick does anything to you, let me know. I'll take the first one back to Korea just to kick his ass”.

Tommy said nothing, just laughed quietly and continued to enjoy the hug they were sharing.

**.  
.**

Tommy posted on his social networks a picture of him and Brick on a night street. The location was posted, but he didn't understand Korean, so he couldn't have known it was Itaewon. He realized what a cute couple they were. It was a selfie, but the colors and the smile they both had gave that image an aura of pure love, he wouldn't know how to explain it, but he felt jealous, as well as envious. At that moment, the girl who was sleeping on his legs was removed, Butch looked at her and felt a tickle in his stomach. Buttercup had fallen asleep while watching a series, supposedly in Butch's company, but he wasn't very friendly with the series in general, he was quite distracted. The girl's gentle snoring made him feel like the luckiest guy on the planet, and that's because she was still there for him, even when there was the slightest doubt about his feelings, she was still there. Buttercup definitely deserved better, but for some reason she wouldn't walk away from Butch.

“Thank you for loving me," he mumbled, knowing that he would not get an answer, "and for staying by my side, even knowing that I am a shitty human being. I promise you, Buttercup, that I will be the best boyfriend for you, I swear, too, that I love you, that I respect you and that I will make you happy, I will give everything of me to achieve that goal,” he closed his eyes a little, laughed weakly and continued talking. “When we go to spend New Year's Eve parties in the southern hemisphere, on some beach, I will renew all my promises and oaths, and then we will get drunk all night while we don't worry about the snow, the cold or the possible rain that will fall, because it's hot there, it will surely be fun,” he took a breath of air, looked at the picture that was still on his cell phone screen, but he blocked it and kept talking to it. “I promise you that I will turn the page, completely, that I will remove any doubt from my head, that it will be just you? I want only you, no one else but you”.

Butch stayed giving Buttercup gentle strokes in her hair until he fell asleep. He still had feelings for Tommy, and he hated feeling things for him, considering that Tommy no longer did, since he gave himself completely to his relationship. He stopped wishing he was Buttercup, while it was Butch who started wishing he was Brick. However, when he had to move to be closer to his college, the distance helped him push away those feelings he had for his friend, and they were increasingly dissipating since Tommy went to Korea. Butch was thankful that things turned out that way, because it showed Buttercup how much he loved her, how much he loved her well, and how much he would give to make her happy, and she accepted each of his demonstrations by staying with him.

“I'm grateful that Thomas never told you how much he liked you," whispered Buttercup, who had been awake since she had moved.

_the end_


End file.
